PS I hate you! (On Hold!)
by StayStrongLikeDemi
Summary: "I hate you" she said with tears streaming down her cheeks making her beautiful grey eyes turn red. "I know...I can't help it...I love you" ***I broke her heart and she hated me...I thought I'd never see her again but yet she came back...the question is what am I going to do now...How am I going to protect her...From who you may ask? Only from myself...Rated T
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER ONE**

Have you ever had this feeling right before you did or said something you realy didn't want to do? The feeling that was telling you to shut up...apologise and pray for the person to forgive you? That feeling that makes you feel like shit because you know you ruined any chances you had with someone but still you ignored it and said what you were so desperetly felt you shouldn't...

I haven't felt that in a while but it's memory is still burning at the back of my head...I understand why she left...why she slapped me with tears in her eyes...why she said she hated me and why the next day I heard she was moving to Texas...I understand that I lost her completely but still I made no move to apologise...no move for forgivness...I just let her leave...

She came to the dojo to say goodbye to all of her friends...Jerry was holding back his tears...Kim didn't even bother...Milton said goodbye by hugging her...and then she standed in front of me...looking straight into my eyes hers being completely...emotionless...lifeless...and red from the crying...

"Goodbye" she said silently looking like breaking down into tears any minute now.

"Yeah...whatever...bye" I said with a blank mask covering my face...Before I could even register anything she took a step closer to me and placed a light tender kiss on my cheek.

"Bye guys" she said on last time before she turned her back to us...walking towards her parents...her golden hair brushing past her shoulders as the wind lightly blew them away from her frame.

"How could you do this to her!" Kim snapped a couple days later at the school cafeteria.

"It had to be done" I said not bothering to ask what she was talking about.

"I honestly don't know if I can even _stand _calling myself your friend!" Kim exclaimed drawing some curious stares to our table.

"Nobody is forcing you" I said serious as I looked straight into her hazel eyes. Eyes I used to find beautiful and alive were teary and bloodshot from the crying and from the tears that threatened to spill.

"Who the hell are you? I don't recognise you anymore!" and with that said she stormed off the room leaving the whole cafeteria looking at me with wide eyes. I guess I should be surprised for her outbrust but I calmly returned back to my lunch tray...

Now two years later Kim talked to me...she forgave me but she doesn't think that _she_ is going to..._her_...just her memory makes my whole body ache...ache for her, ache for the pain I caused her but I don't regret anything...it had to be done...

It was what was best for her...it was all for her...ofcourse she doesn't know that...

* * *

Today was a shiny day...the sun was vibrating warmth even though we just entered September...here in Seaford, California the weather is always great...Something that bugs me to the fullest since my mood isn't happy all the time...especially today.

I don't know what was so special about today but all I wanted to do was rip someone's head off. I silently walked past my parents, ignoring their worried faces and walked to my car. I turned on the ignesion and furiously drove to Kim's house.

"Well you look like a mess..."she said when she sat into my car. I just groaned and looked at her through my glasses.

"Put your seatbelt on"

"You're not wearing it" she stated looking a little worried.

"I know! Just put your damn seatbelt on!"

"Okay!" she said right back at my face while she clapsed her seatbelt. The minute that sound echoed in my head I stepped on the gas and the car roared into life as it sped down the road and into the highway towards school.

"Oh I get...you're in one of those moods" I heard her mutter and I couldn't help but roll my eyes...I knew she couldn't see it but it didn't matter...all I wanted to do was let some steam out...she was just unlucky since she had to be in the car too...

When we finally reached school Kim quickly stepped out the car started smiling to every living thing that passed next to her. I forgot to mention that I'm a senior...me and Jerry while Milton and Kim are sompomores...I saw Kim linking arms with a brunette girl and all I was watching was her...but ofcourse she was at Texas...away from here...away from me, away from the pain and the trouble I only seem to offer...

"Jack!" I felt a hand connect with my cheek and a stinging sensation spreading through half of my face.

"What the fuck?!"

"Don't swear at me" Kim said narrowing her eyes at me. "You didn't hear a word I said did you?"

"No" I answered truthfully.

"Ugh. You really have to stop living at your thoughts...it's not sane..."

"Who said I am?" Kim didn't take what I said seriously and she just rolled her eyes and start looking really angry...like looking at someone could kill him. I looked over my shoulder to see what she was watching and that's when I saw Jerry making out with Donna.

"Ugh. She is probably just using him to get back at you for dumping her" Kim said to me.

"Kim...Jerry is using her too" I said in a matter of fact tone.

"I know"

"Yeah...he can be an asshole sometimes"

"Like you." Kim stated.

"Yep. Like me" Kim let out a small chuckle. She was talking to me and laughing occasionaly to what I said but I knew...I knew deep down she hasn't forgave me yet...I don't think she will...I mean...I did broke her best friend's already broken heart...more viciously and brutally...but don't make me repeat my shelf...it had to be done...

"You'll drive me home?" she asked looking at me suddenly with no joy at all...I guess spending time with me causes this to people...

"Only if you want" I said as I pretended to look for something in my locker.

"I think I'll go home with Grace" she mumbled looking at her feet.

"Okay"

"Bye" she said and turned on her heel and left...before I could even make a move Jerry came running towards me.

"Dude, dude, dude"

"What?"

"I have two things to say" Jerry said.

"Okay?"

"First: I make out with Donna hope you don't mind."

"Fuck her...like I care...just don't knock her up...what's the other?"

"She's back" Jerry said a hint of excitment and sadness in his eyes.

"Who?"

"Enielle" Jerry said. I think my heart stopped for a second. The knowing feeling of guilt and regret washed over me just by hearing her name...two years but still I care way too much about her...

"What?" I asked right before I gulped.

"I saw her she moved back from Texas" Jerry added. Enielle? Why would she come back? Why would-

I couldn't finish my thought though since Jerry cut me off by whispering something that I have to be honest scared me a little bit...

"She's different"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know about personality or whatever...I just saw her walking to the principal's office...I almost didn't recognise her" Jerry said. This can't be happening...Enielle hating me from a distance was much more easier than having her hate me from up close.

"I-I'm sorry...I have...um...-"

"Ah-ha...Brewer and Martinez...first day of school but yet you still are the same little criminals" the headmaster said and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Crminals? Really now? Okay we weren't the best students but we weren't criminals.

" why don't you leave? we are having an adult conversation much more important than your stupid detention that we're going to have by the end of the day" I growled at him. He seemed taken aback but still handed us a small green paper that obviously was our detention.

The headmaster left and I turned my attention back to Jerry.

"I'm leaving" was all I said before I turned around and bumped on a really smaller person.

"Watch it you blind idiot" she snapped at me. She was obviously new...her blood red dyed hair feel loose on her shoulders completely covering her face.

"Um...Jack-" Jerry was about to say something but I completely shut him up by just a hand gesture.

"Excuse me?" I said to the girl who was on her one knee collecting her books.

"I said watch it you blind idi-" and she stopped talking once hair eyes met mine. I gulped...You have to be fucking kidding me. This was such a cheesy moment but all I cared about was the girl...her beautiful grey eyes looked socked- I guess exactly the same like mine - and her mouth was open in a shape of O.

Her eyes...these eyes I missed so much but still didn't want to face...

"Oh! It's you" the girl said...Enielle said...I was at loss for words...she was standing right there...right infront of me...Jerry was right...she had changed...I'm not talking about the hair...even though it was weird not seeing her golden locks...she had changed physically as well...she wasn't a 15 year old teenager anymore...her body had changed causing me to have some really naughty thoughts about it...she was 17 now and she had grown into a young woman...and I can't describe with words How much I loved that...I just wanted the garb her and kiss her till we would both be gasping for air...I couldn't though...I closed my eyes and without saying anything more I passed her and walked straight to my car...

This can't be happening to me...I did everything I could to keep her away but she was back...

And she was as beautiful a girl could be...

and she hated me...

Who blames her?

**_***_Tell me what you think!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Shoutout to Ruzza and fanfictionlover211 for being my first reviewers! Thank you!**

**CHAPTER TWO **

FUCK.

MY.

LIFE.

FUCK IT.

FUCK IT.

FUCK IT!

Me being the most lucky person in the fucking world and having the perfect life...please note the sarcasm!

Why did she came back? Me breaking her heart wasn't enough to keep her away? Keep her safe? She just had to come back?

"Dude come on...don't leave" I heard Jerry shout at me. I looked back for just a split second and she was gone...Jerry was standing there alone...Maybe she had the brains to stay away?

Maybe she wasn't that naive...?

"Fine...I'll stay"

"You know sometimes I think you still love her" Jerry said. I grabbed a fist foul of his shirt and pined him at a locker nearby.

"I never loved her!" I growled. "She was a really good _toy_ " I said with venom in my voice as I let go of him.

"Whatver helps you sleep at night" Jerry said and before I could react he was gone...running down the hall towards his first class. I slowly walked towards my class.

A toy? was Enielle really just a _toy_? Like all the others after her? No. Did I treat her like a toy? You bet. Maybe worse.

_"Hi" her small and sweet voice sounded really weak through the really powerful autumn wind. I ignored her...not bothering to raise even my head._

_"I'm Enielle" she said as she tended her hand for me to shake. Soon her hand fell back to her side when I made no move to aknowledge her or even talk to her._

_"Do you ever talk?" she snapped after a while and my head shot up so fast I'm surprised I didn't get whiplash._

_"Ofcourse I talk don't be an idiot" I spat at her. The minutes my eyes came in contact with her grey orbs I think I forgot to breathe. You know these chessy cliche moments were you read only in novels and you never imagine they could happen to you? Yup that's the one. Her eyes help a wide range of emotions...like pride since she got me to talk to her...hurt since I didn't talk very nicely._

_"Well what's your name?" she asked with a smile back on her lips._

_"Are you serious?" she looked surprised..._

_"What?" she asked as she tilted her head to the side letting some straps of her golden hair fall on her tiny shoulders._

_"I don't want to talk to you" I said right in her face._

_"Well I don't want to fail my chemistry exams...too bad none of us is going to take what he wants..." she said shrugging her shoulders. Is this chick serious?_

_"Look Enielle right? I am not interested in being friends with a goodie two-shoes so...move it" I said angrily._

_"So? I don't want to be friends with a bad boy! So hear what we're going to do...you'll teach my how to be bad and I'll teach you how to be nice" she said smiling._

_"No."_

_"Come on! It will be fun!" she said clapping her hands._

_"What are you five?" I spat at her and all joy was gone from her face._

_"You know? If you weren't such an ass all the time people might want to talk to you" she said angrily._

_"Well what can I say? I'm an ass" I said smirking at her. She simply rolled her eyes._

_"Fake." was all she said. "You CAN be nice...you helped me at the library even though I was a total stranger" she said in a matter of fact tone._

_"So? Forget it! I just gave you a book"_

_"You helped me...what's your name?"_

_"I don't want to be friends with you!"_

_"You don't have any friends...what's your name?"_

_"Look I told you a million times...Not interested"_

_"Don't care...what's your name?"_

_"God! It's Jack! My name is Jack"_

_"It's nice to meet you" she said smiling._

_"You have got to be kidding me..."_

_"So Jack...what grade are you?"_

_"You're not going to give up right?" I asked and she shook her head no._

_"9th"_

_"At junior high school?"_

_"No at kindergarden! Ofcourse at junior high school" I said angrily._

_"Okay, calm your tits...boy you got a temper...I'm one year younger"_

_"Guess what sweetheart...I. DON'T. CARE."_

_"Yeah...well...I don't care if you care."_

_"I don't care if you don't care if I care" I said angrily._

_"What?" she asked with a confused expression._

_"Anyway...so Jack last question for today..."_

_"What do you mean for today?" she just ignored me._

_"Can you smile?" she asked as her cheeks fired up._

_"What?" I asked surprised._

_"I've never seen you smile...not this year not previous years...so I wondering if you could give a smile...not a smirk...a smile..."_

_I couldn't help but laugh! A person can't be more naive than her..._

_"Will you leave afterwards?"_

_"Just for today" she warned and I rolled my eyes. Right then I looked at her grey ones and gave her the smile she asked. Her cheeks turned into a deep red shade and she smiled back at me._

_"Thank you. See you tom." and with that she got up and left._

_"Hey wait!" I shout and she turned around and looked at me._

_"Yes?"_

_"Do you need a lift or something?" I asked as I rubbed nervously the back of my neck. What the hell? Nervous? Me?_

_"I'd love that" she said smiling and we both walked to my car._

I pushed the door open and walked into the class not bothering to explain why was I late...I already have detention so why bother?

"Mr. Brewer what time is this?" my teacher Mrs. Applebaum asked. She was around her late 20's with short cut hair...if I did paid attention to the teachers I think she could be a good one.

"It's 8.30" I said as I checked the time on my phone.

"What took you so long?"

"Memories" I said as I rested my feet on the desk in front of me. I put on my earphones and pressed play on Linkin Park's 'Numd'...

* * *

All I heard was a shriek...a loud happy shriek that belonged to Kim. I turned around my back facing my locker now and watched Kim smiling and running towards a smiling Enielle.

"Oh my god! I've missed you!" Kim said as she brought Enielle into a tight hug.

"I missed you too" Enielle said smiling widely.

_"Guys this is my best friend Enielle" I heard Kim say._

_"You have got to be fucking kidding me" I said as I let my eyes wonder on the girl's appearance. The girl I met earlier today..._

_"Oh! Hi Jack!" she said smiling._

_"Yeah...hi"_

_"You two know each other?" Kim asked. _

_"No." I said the same time the girl-Enielle- said "yes."_

_"We've met earlier today" Enielle said._

_"No...you...you...oh who am I kidding?" she shot me a toothy smile that made my heart accelerate...there is the cheesy cliche moment again. Ignore it!_

_"Great! so you know one more person at the dojo" Kim said as she showed Enielle the dojo._

_"You're joining in?" I asked her._

_"Yup"_

_"You sure?"_

_"What's that suppossed to mean?"_

_"You don't seem the aggresive type of girl" I said shrugging my shoulders._

_"Well...you don't know me...you can't know If I'm an aggresive type or not" she said smiling. Kim led her to Rudy's office and they both went in smiling and talking about a jock at school._

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming back?" Kim asked.

"Surprise!" Enielle said smiling goofily. That's my girl...goofy as always...

"Yay! How long will you stay?"

"A year for sure...then we'll see" she said shrugging her shoulders.

"I love your hair" Kim said while taking one of her blood red locks in her hands.

"Thanks...I needed a change" Enielle said every trace of happiness vanished as she lifted her head and our eyes locked. It was just for a brief second before she ripped her eyes out of mine but it felt weird...I was glad I could see her grey eyes again...but mad at the same time...she wasn't suppossed to come back...she whispered something into Kim's ear as she nodded and left towrds the cafeteria. Enielle's eyes locked with mine again but this time she didn't break eye contact as she walked closer...

All my body went rigid when she approached more as she dug her hand into one of her pockets and pulled a small necklase.

"I guess I don't need that anymore" she said as she passed the necklase into my hand. With that said she turned around and left. I looked at the necklase...the infinity necklase I gave her after one year we were together...

_"Close your eyes" I whispered as I pulled away from our kiss._

_"Okay" she said and she closed her eyes._

_"Don't peek"_

_"Come on!" she whined._

_"Just close your eyes for two minutes" I said sighing._

_"Fine"_

_I slipped the chain around her neck and locked it. She opened her eye and looked at what was hunging on her small neck._

_"It's beautiful" she said looking back into my eyes._

_"Not more than you are" she smiled and leaned in for an other kiss as we both ignored the weird stares we got from our classmates...They didn't mean anything..._

What really happened to me after that day is a mystery to me as well...

* * *

"Where were you at lunch?" Kim asked me when we were at the dojo.

"I figured it would be better to give you some time with...um..."

"Enielle" Kim finished my sentence.

"Yes...her"

"Thank you!" Kim said smiling.

"yeah...whatever"

"Don't whatever me!" Kim said, her hands at both sides of her waist.

"Sorry Kimmy" I said with a smirk taking over my face. She starting slapping my arm and then she starting kicking but I didn't even feel it.

"DON'T. CALL. ME. _KIMMY!_" She said still hitting me as I grabbed her waist and threw her on my shoulder and spinning her around playfully.

"You jerk put me down!" she said through her laughter.

"Hmmhm" someone cleared his throat and I stopped spinning Kim around and placed her down. I looked at the person and my smile fell...

"What are you doing here?" I asked trying to sound annoyed.

"I didn't know it was forbidden for me to come here...and since you asked I came to join" she said in a matter of fact tone as she walked towards Rudy's office and knocked on the door.

"Come in" we heard Rudy say and the next thing you hear was Rudy screaming like a twelve year old girl that just saw One direction...

* * *

So Enielle stayed for practise...We didn't even look at each other...When practise was over she started talking to Milton about being lab partners at Chemistry since as she said was awful.

_"I hate Chemistry!"_

_"Why so hate?" I asked her as I placed a kiss on her neck. She let out an overdramatic sigh and turned around so now she was facing me._

_"Have you ever opened a chemistry book? It sucks! It's the most horrible, awful and annoying subject! I don't know why people think it's useful?...Well maybe it is useful but for scientists not Junior High Kids!" I was speechless! Her little outburst was adorable!_

_"Why are you smiling?" she asked as she rested her head on my shoulder._

_"You're so adorable when you're mad..." I said and she looked at me with a confused expression. "...and hot!" and with that she flashed a deep scarlet red._

_"I am not!" she said as her cheeks flamed a deeper shade of red- if that's even possible._

_"You are...more than you know...you're special" I said and she just gave me a kiss._

"Owww! I missed you too" Enielle said through her phone to whoever she was speaking. The other person talked and Enielle's eyes widened, her mouth fell and her cheeks flamed...I used to make her blush...

"I know it's only two days..." she paused and the other person talked again.

"Maybe christmas" she said shrugging her shoulders. The person talked and a smile lit up her face.

"Really?" she asked happily.

"Oh my god! I love you!" she exclaimed and I stiffened...she was talking to a guy...maybe her boyfriend?

"Okay...bye!" she said and the person said something that made her laugh.

"Me too...talk to you at night!" and she hung up.

"Who was that?" Kim asked smiling.

"Um..." Enielle started as she rubbed her hand and shot me a spontanious glance. She quickly shook her head and straightened her back.

"It was Max...my boyfriend from Texas...you know...long distance" she said shrugging her shoulders.

"Oh great! You'll tell me everything!" Kim said as she and Enielle left.

So fucking great!

She moved on...and now you ask me why am I jealous and mad? I broke up with her...dumped her...I moved on and she was suppossed to do the same...I guess it should still hurt...

**_***Hey guys! I just wanted to tell you that because I have an other story on progress (Until she showed up!) I won't be able to upload regularly since until she showed up! is coming first! I hope you guys understand..._**

**_Question: Why do you think Jack broke up with Enielle? What did you thought about his behaviour?_**

**_That's it! Till next time !_**


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